Chunky Knit DS Cover: Rise of the Hipster

For knitters: needles:7mm Yarn:7mm, 3x k2,p2 = 1 row

 You may have noticed I've started knitting. You may have not, hey, I dunno what you do with your spare time. I started at Christmas, that night I stayed up for ages fiddling with my fingers and watching the Halle Berry Catwoman film and mumbling my review along to it, and probably taking it more seriously than anyone has ever taken it before. (Is it sexist that this superhero movie is half rom-com? Is that a good thing? Would it be worse if she was a male superhero in a female body? Her hair is WORSE after she cuts it. She is fighting against beauty standards that SHE FULFILLS IN EVERY WAY ARGH)


You don't really want to see my FIRST knitting project seeing as it's is a misshapen abomination of disgustingly garish colours, holes, places I'd forgotten which way around I was meant to be knitting so there are blocks which are inside out and pretty much every other thing you can think of that can be wrong with a piece of knitting. It's best left alone, it doesn't really know how to socialise with other knitting projects and I keep it chained up in the basement so it doesn't blind and garotte people.
Since then though, I've gotten a little more crafty.

Crafty crafty crafty. *Cackles*

Ahem. Anyways, I knitted this DS cover for Matthew, cause he just got one. And I'd just finished covers for my phone and iPod and my fingernails were crying out for me to start a new project so I wouldn't chew them all off while watching Stargate SG1.


(Hey, remember The Eyes? Quiver at the epicness that is The Eyes, the flickering blue pan across O'Neill's epically epic eyes as he stares off into the awesome depths of the event horizon. If The Eyes don't make you laugh and cheer you up then your cheesiness-appreciation organ is DYING, consult a doctor immediately.
They're eight seconds in.)

ENTER: The Topman-impersonating, Chunky-Knit, Slate-Grey DS Cover. Complete with two-stitch ribbing racing stripes. Cause when you're riding your DS, you don't want it to be slow.

If I ever sell any of my knitting, the labour-time will be measured in episodes of Stargate.

 I've also discovered knitting is a good substitute for my usual solution to nail-destroying: constant eating. I'm telling you, I can't watch a show or movie or go to the cinema without eating constantly. The entire time. Which isn't so bad mostly, except when I accidentally eat stuff I was meant to be saving for tea, or when I don't notice that I'm full so the credits roll up and its only then I realise I feel post-christmas-dinner nauseous.

PUT THE FOOD DOWN RACHAEL.

Or I'll chew through two bags of popcorn in a row and become the dehydrated salty-claw-hand monster. Also I'm hell to watch anything with cause I'm constantly getting up every ten minutes to go get more food, and I don't say anything, i just go, forcing whoever I'm with into the awkward Do-I-Pause-It? dilemma.

I'm COMING okay, but this soup is WILDY underseasoned!

 I'm just saying, something productive to do with your hands when you watch as much movies and shows as I do can only be a good thing.

And it looks like I'm just going to have to accept that I am the Pretentious Cinema Goer, take my knitting, take my olives and artichokes and be not afraid of my hipster aura. Perhaps I should just go the whole hog and knit myself a pouch to carry Sherlock with me, don my beret and get some fake nerd glasses. Or start wearing 3D ones all the time. Or maybe I should just start punching random people in the face. Cause it's less douchey.


 To send you off: DISNEY HIPSTERS

 

[Recipe] Big Bowl of Sunshine

 The perfect blend of cheery up, comforting and healthy, (ha! healthy! I hear you cry. No, its not hugely healthy, at least for vegan food. Of course it is compared to a big mac, but isn't everything? I consider it the midway point between undressed kale salad and a fried chicken burger oozing oil), this dish aims to bring summer right into your kitchen.



There's just something HAPPY about having your own little yellow sun simmering on the stove, once you stop to notice it, so technically this dish starts its ruthless optimism and good cheer before it even hits your tongue.

You'll probably know this is a frankenstein of a dish, I can't claim ownership because its really a reworking of several recipes some of which are mine and some of which aren't. (Notably, Isa Chandra's Roast Broccoli, and her Curried Udon+Broccoli, and my Chickpea Fried Rice).

So, this dish is all yellow and green, garlicky yellow rice, with crunchy toasty broccoli, and whatever other fresh green stuff you have on hand. This time I'm using avocado, coriander and maybe some rocket.

It's pretty simple to make.

Ingredients:

2 or 3 cloves of garlic (or smoked garlic)
2 Cups long grain rice
4 cups vegetable broth
Salt to taste
Olive/Vegetable Oil
Half to a whole head of broccoli
A few teaspoons of turmeric
A teaspoon curry powder

Optional additions: (I'm using them all)
-A tablespoon vegan margerine (to add to simmering rice)
-Half an avocado, sliced
-Coriander/rocket to garnish
-Pre-mixed ground Pilau seasoning

Steps:

1. Fry the garlic until soft, add rice and mix to coat. Once rice is coated in oil, add broth, salt, turmeric and curry powder (and pilau mix and margerine if using). Cover and leave to simmer.

2. Cut broccoli into florets, toss in oil, salt and put into oven to roast at about 190 degrees.

3. Once rice has absorbed all the water and is cooked through, and broccoli is slightly charred but still crunchy, serve in bowl with garnishes.

Best (and worst) Books Covers

By no means a definitive collection, I basically just googled "best book covers" and picked my favourites.

colours! food! plants! all my favourite things.

Nuff said.

Successful photography!

TEXTURE, MM, PAPER TEXTURE, C'MERE YOU SEXY THING..

Swirly swirly...

Da'dorable

Oh Greg

Geddit?

Simple images used well. Thumbs up!

And... I thought it would be fun to do my least favourite covers too.

Please, If you can't use photoshop, DON'T.

Fencing with a unicorn? That's really what you want people to take away from your book?

I hope this is satire. I really really do.

This isn't an E-Book teaching me how to make money on the internet, but you wouldn't guess it.

What is with the ACTION THRILLER FONT?

Even more SUPER DANGEROUS ACTION THRILLER FONT

Eeeeeewwwwww.....

Alright, we get it, you like Twilight. Lose the wet-look font.

EYES...BURNING...

If I see one more sci/fantasy painting I will die...

Is that the actual Twilight font? Badly photoshopped flowers which don't match the colouring of the stock photo, urggh...

Ugliest frakking thing I've ever seen in my life.

JEM MAN EXISTS!! I've changed my mind, I love this one. I'm going to find this book and read it.

Please hire someone who did standard grade art and got a C or above.